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Letters

Sylvia,
I’m sure you probably remember me. But if you don’t, I’m going to jiggle your memory. I hope you don’t mind, but I want to tell people that might read this, my story. About 24 years ago, God started to do a work on me. Even though I wasn’t a regular Church goer, when I did go, I went to Churches of the same denomination. “Quite legalistic” Looking back, I can see God was untwisting all the false beliefs I had been raised to believe. Since I’ve always been some what of a wild man, even as a kid, I never measured up to what I believe God expected me to be since I was a Born Again believer.
So the God I knew up till my very early 40s, obviously had to hate me. I’d go to Church and everybody else looked like they had the Christian Life nailed down. Well, I knew I didn’t. In fact I always doubted my salvation. I don’t know how many times back then, I’d repented and asked Jesus to come into my heart, again! But, being a very poor actor, I couldn’t even pretend very well. I felt like a total phony, because I was. So I did what most people do in my situation. I just assumed I had to be saved, and I was going to Heaven, and I didn’t expect much else.
One Sunday during Church God really grabbed me. He told me, there’s a bunch of actors in here. Their no different then you, their just better actors then you. That day started me on a quest. I didn’t know what I was looking for really, but in hind sight, I was looking for the truth. Once I started down that road, my whole life fell apart. Satan was attacking me with vengeance. My marriage collapse. Wife and kids all turned against me, and over the next 2 years it got so bad, it’s a small wonder I didn’t commit suicide. But very early one day after my wife left me, I had just gotten off the phone arguing with her. As I was walking back to my truck out of the middle of nowhere I heard: “Dennis, I will never leave you.” No, it wasn’t just a thought. I was mad as all get out at that moment and God was the last thing on my mind. But it was audible. It stopped me right in the middle of the street. The first thing I thought was, nobody would ever believe this. But I knew what I heard, and I knew it was Jesus. That’s all He said, but He spoke 3 more times to me over the next 2 years. That was 22-24 years ago. After that experience I didn’t doubt my salvation again. With my life crashing all around me,
I started going to a Christian counselor. One day he gave me a book. The title was. “The Treasures Of Darkness.” By Sylvia Pearce. I read the book, and yes it all made sense, but I was looking for my life to turn around. Well, it didn’t. It just got worse. Much worse. It got so bad that I was accused of something I didn’t even do, and was facing 4 years in prison for it. The accuser? My wife of 18 years. Actually, I got worse too. I was a total basket case. I didn’t go to prison, but the whole thing destroyed my life. Being quite known because I had been a local contractor for years in a small community destroyed me. Up till this time, I had always been someone that prided himself on, just getting the job done. I went into the Marine Corp at 17.
After that, I got into construction. At 23, with just a few tools and $200 I struck out on my own as a Contractor. By 29 I had a good business, but decided I wanted to be a Pilot. Went through the training as fast as I could and became a commercial Pilot for a large cargo airline. So all of this had created in me a sense of self confidence. I thought I could do just about anything I decided to do. What I’m trying to say here is, I was a hard case. Getting rid of self is really hard when you believe so strongly ‘in self. I was such a hard case, even the Christian counselor that gave me Sylvia’s book quit me. Kicked me out of his office one day I had him so frustrated. I was at my wits end. Wife left me, kids are against me, and now even my counselor quits me.
So about a year later I read Sylvia’s book again. As I was finishing the book, I noticed Sylvia had her address and phone number in the back of the book. I called her immediately. I suppose at the time I was desperate. The worse she could do to me would be hang up on me. She answered the phone and I explained I was from a Michigan and had just finished her book for the second time, and I have some questions. She said; I have company but if you’ll give me your number I’ll call you back. About 1 1/2 hours later she did, and we talked for the next 1 1/2 hours. That started a 2 year friendship, that meant more to me then any other I’ve ever had. Most of the time I felt like a pest. But the unraveling of all the false beliefs (the law) just took a long time for me. Sylvia turned me onto Norman Grubbs writings. I read all of those. I read probably 20-30 other books during this time also. I don’t think I bought hardly any of them. It just seemed like somebody else was giving me a book, and it was the perfect book I needed next. During this 2 year period, I was a Pilot for a cargo charter company. Our main customer was Ford Motor Company. With ‘just in time’ Freight, if something breaks down in the supply line, companies will charter airplanes to go pick up parts. I’ve made many trips deep into Mexico, only to pick up a couple pallets of parts. I was in Louisville Airport many times dropping off freight that was going to the Ford plant Sylvia’s husband worked at. But we never laid over there. Then one day, I got a trip. The company was going to airline me to Louisville to swap out the Captain that was with the airplane so he could go on his days off. The airplane was broke down, and they said I’d just be going to the Hotel when I got there. I called Sylvia immediately. I had been talking to her for 2 years on the phone, and I was finally going to get the chance to meet her in person. She came out to the a Hotel that night and we sat in the lounge and talked for a long time. Life has a way of taking many directions, and shortly after that, I finally stopped bugging her. Sylvia, I hope you read this. It’s been 20 years since I last talked to you. But to this day, you probably impacted my life more then anybody else ever has. I want to say THANK YOU for being there when I needed somebody like you and for putting up with me. I’ll never forget you! I hope you don’t mind. But I’m going to post this to several of your videos. If my story can help someone else, all the better.
 
God Bless You Sylvia And Many Thanks,
 Dennis Conrad                         
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